The Knowing Place

Inside every woman there is A Knowing Place….

No one has access to this precious garden but her; not her mother, not her lover, not her children...The gates open only to her touch, with her key, at her command.

Inside this fortress (which rumor has it lies in the vicinity of the heart and hasn't much to do with the head) she finds the answers to all life's questions. Inside, all mysteries are revealed, confusions calmed, anxieties alleviated...because this place contains the wisdom to see her through the seasons of her life; to carry her across the turbulent waters.

When a woman is in her Knowing Place nothing can shake her certainty and conviction. Not a single "fact," no "data point," no reasoned argument. She cannot be swayed when she is safe inside this sacred spot because she is standing on solid ground. When a woman is in her Knowing Place she can whisper her worries into the wind or throw her frustrations into the fire. From that vantage point she sees the path clearly: she hears a response to all of life's laments: the why me's, the what ifs, and what now's. And it's this: everything, my dear, everything is perfect. This--all of it--is at it was meant to be. Trust. She is shown the way to grow and then pushed back out into the world rid of her overwhelm and blocked vision; rid of self pity and self hatred. Heaving sighs of relief and conviction; she wipes her tears and lifts her head and moves ever onward, ever upward.

What's sad is that most women have forgotten the way to their Knowing Place. (Indeed, many women aren't even aware it exists.) We were born with this gift, but it was slowly taken away from us by the doubts and denials of others, by a culture crippled by reason and a fear of all that makes a woman a magical creature.

Many women spend a lifetime looking outside themselves for certainty, seeking a garden to match the one in their primordial memory. And never finding it. Some lucky ones recover theirs before it is completely covered over. And though it can be sad to encounter such a once-splendid place in a state of ruin, take heart! It can always be restored.

And here is a secret, sisters...It is a lucky woman who is sent searching inside herself for this forgotten place. For no doctor, no sister, no sage can tell a woman where to find it. She must venture in on her own because all else outside has failed.

The trigger is usually something severe: heartbreak, grief, despair, pain. Something about which others will say, "oh, I'm so sorry!" And "that's just awful!" But they don't understand that what she's been given in that lost love, that last goodbye, that diagnosis, is a key. The key to a world of knowing once again what she needs and how she wants to be cared for. It's the key to healing and the alchemy that transforms suffering into pure light. Because the Knowing Place eats pain for breakfast, devours worries as snacks and dines on the gravest doubts. It transforms this food into tolerance, resilience, forbearance and acceptance. It transforms her from what others want her to be into what she has always known she is.

This is why a woman retreats when she is in pain...not to hide, not to unburden the world, but to seek that place of solace and healing inside where she knows what she needs, how to ask for it, and who are her allies. When she finds it, watch out! Because the flame of that transformative fire will illuminate the cosmos and burn down anything standing in her way.


-Schuyler Brown


Alexi Transparent